wow 10-07-14Willy

11 NOTABLE PEOPLE WHO MOST LIKELY DIED A VIRGIN

Many people consider sex the greatest pleasure in life and, of course, without it reproduction would be simply impossible. Also let’s not overlook that sex has become a business as well for many decades now since nothing sells as much as sex does. But what about the people who spit on sex and turn their backs on it? Are they weird? Are they scared? Are they just not interested?

In this list we will learn about eleven notable people who either by choice, from ideology, by need, or just due to the circumstances never got any and died as pure as they were born.

11. Hans Christian Anderson

The legendary Danish author who gave the world some of the most awesome fairy tales in history including “The Little Mermaid,” “The Snow Queen,” and “The Ugly Duckling” among many others, never got married or had a relationship despite having a few well-known unrequited crushes on both men and women. We would probably describe him as a bisexual nowadays, even though from what we know Hans Christian Anderson had an innocent child’s soul and his crushes were nothing but platonic in nature. It is almost certain that he died a virgin. 

10. Queen Elizabeth I

Queen Elizabeth I of England, one of the most famous queens in British history, gave her name to an era that many historians claim to be the golden age in English history, during which time England celebrated one of its greatest military victories against the Spanish Armada, which attempted to conquer England during her reign in 1588. Elizabeth was also known as The Virgin Queen because she passionately refused to ever marry or develop sexual relationships, a fact for which various artists and authors celebrated her as she grew older and became a cult figure and symbol of purity and integrity. 

9. Lewis Carroll

Carroll’s claim to fame is Alice in Wonderland, but the children’s literature author was one of those weirdoes who never married and kept collections of nude photographs of young girls. He was also not known to have had any romantic relationships with women or men, a fact that made many people of his time believe that he was a pedophile.

However, here at TCmag we tend to believe that he was more of a Michael Jackson–kind of mofo who was mainly harmless, but still not one to trust your child with alone. One way or another and from all the evidence we have about him, it seems like Lewis Carroll died a lonely virgin who enjoyed staring at naked photographs of young girls and would have probably been prosecuted in modern times for child pornography. 

8. Isaac Newton

You’ve probably heard about Sir Isaac Newton being one of the most influential scientists of all time and a key figure in the Scientific Revolution, which took place in Europe in the late seventeenth century. His book Mathematical Principles of Natural Philosophy, published in 1687 for the first time, laid the foundation for classical mechanics.

However, what most don’t seem to know is that Newton probably didn’t enjoy any other “pleasures” in life other than his passion for science. He never married or maintained a romantic relationship in his life and was described as a solitary individual who didn’t have many friends of either sex. Many historians believe that he died a virgin probably by choice. 

7. Andy Warhol

Andy Warhol is the father of the visual art movement known as Pop Art and will always be remembered as the one who coined the widely used expression “fifteen minutes of fame.” His radical and essential ideas galvanized the 1960s art world like no other and he became one of the first gay icons of modern history, opening the way for many gay artists and fashion designers who came after him.

However, despite being synonymous with a wild lifestyle that included drugs, alcohol, and crazy parties, it’s more than just a possibility that Andy Warhol died a virgin. During an interview in 1980, Warhol indicated that he was still a virgin and it’s very possible that his sexual life didn’t change much (if at all) for the last seven years of his life. He died in 1987. 

6. Immanuel Kant

Immanuel Kant was one of the most significant and influential eighteenth-century philosophers but as a person was often described as a little unusual not to mention weird. He didn’t get along much with people, he didn’t like to associate with other philosophers, and nor did he listen to classical music as most philosophers of his era did. Instead he preferred the municipal brass band playing free, open-air concerts. He also never got married or involved in any romances and most historians believe that he fully dedicated his life to philosophy and deep thinking, and thus died a virgin. 

5. Nikola Tesla

If Nikola Tesla were a rapper he would probably go by the nickname “VWA,” aka Virgin With Attitude. The legendary Serbian innovator abstained from sex his entire life because he strongly believed that sex would distract him from his work. It’s good to know that someone as great as Nikola Tesla considered sex nothing but a waste of time and energy, even though we beg to differ with his view on the subject. One way or another, mad respect to the great Tesla!

4. Joan of Arc

I guess they didn’t call her the “Virgin Warrior” for nothing. It’s no secret that Joan of Arc was a badass with lots of power who wore men’s clothing and succeeded in combat where male generals failed; to make a long story short, she was the kind of woman who didn’t take shit from any man and the closest thing to a hardcore feminist in her time. So, after taking all the previous facts into account one can easily understand that she wouldn’t give up her most important virtue to one of the many, many male chauvinists of her period.

Further, her strictly enforced, religion-based, no-sex policy wouldn’t allow her to maintain any kind of sexual or romantic relationship before marriage so she definitely died a virgin at the age 19 when several intimidated men (with a micropenis condition, in our humble opinion) executed her because they couldn’t handle her. 

3. Henry Cavendish

Henry Cavendish was a British natural philosopher, scientist, and an important experimental and theoretical chemist and physicist. He is best remembered and credited for the discovery of hydrogen and for being one of the shiest scientists in history who avoided every social activity and association with other people.

He almost never talked or had any conversations with people, always dressed in a very old-fashioned way, and as far as we know from all the credible sources regarding him, he never developed any personal relationships outside those with his family members. It is believed that he didn’t have any friends so a girlfriend or a sexual partner is pretty much a mission impossible here for our poor boy Cavendish, who most likely died a virgin.  

2. Hypatia

Hypatia was a brilliant philosopher who refused to obey the social and religious rules of her time and unfortunately paid for it. A strong Greek woman who lived in Alexandria and rejected Christianity, Hypatia’s rebellious attitude and free spirit were the main reason she became the target of a Christian mob (another micropenis issue, anyone?) and was murdered after being falsely accused of enflaming a clash between two prominent figures in Alexandria: the governor Orestes and the bishop of Alexandria.

According to many historians, her murder effectively marked the downfall of Alexandrian intellectual life, even though other historians state that Hellenistic philosophy continued to flourish for two more centuries after her death. But back to our list’s premise, however: It’s a safe bet that Hypatia died a virgin. 

1. Jesus Christ

Let’s be honest now, did any of you really think that Jesus wouldn’t be on this list? Deep inside you knew that Jesus would be the #1 entry, didn’t you? The Son of God, or God himself according to the Christian faith, had a human nature as well as a divine and from all the written evidence we have related to Jesus we get to know that he never had any sexual relationships during his life, which he dedicated to his main cause, which was none other than taking the sins of the world on his shoulders. Probably the most famous virgin (and probably the safest bet) in history, Jesus Christ takes the number-one spot in this list, fair and square.   

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